Semolina and chocolate dessert

Has anyone ever been more tired than me? I might be emotional if I had the energy, but it's ran out. Don't worry I haven't got some strange, undiagnosed illness, it all makes sense and I will tell you why I'm so very tired soon. In the meantime, I need to write and cook, write and cook, and even though those are the things I love doing most, it doesn't always come easily. Some days are a fountain of perfectly chosen words, metaphors and ideas, while others are... Blank. And part of writing a book appears to be not letting the blank days get you down. Sugar helps these days. I spent so many years trying to avoid it, but now I just don't care. These semolina desserts topped with chocolate sauce and pecans are nutritious, refreshing and energising all at the same time. Perfect.

First, you need to blend the semolina well with a couple of tablespoons of cold water. Bring your milk to the boil and stir the semolina into it. Allow to simmer and thicken. Once it's gloopy, take it off the heat and cool completely. While its cooling make the chocolate sauce by heating the butter, sugar and cocoa powder along with 3 tablespoons of water in a pan, and stirring until smooth. Toast the pecans on a frying pan - it makes them so much tastier. Once the semolina is cool put it in a blender and slowly add the lemon juice, sugar, vanilla essence and butter, blending all the time. When you have a paste pour it into your serving bowls, top with chocolate sauce and pecans and chill for at least half an hour. Semolina, or "kasza manna" as it's known in Poland, is often eaten for breakfast so I think these little pots would also make a lovely start to the day.

Ingredients

8 tablespoons semolina

400ml milk

125g sugar

125g butter

1 teaspoon vanilla essence

Juice of half a lemon

2 tablespoons raw cacao powder

100g butter

100g sugar

Pecans

Sugar-free chocolate-coconut truffles and the power of gratitude

In 2015 instead of New Year's Resolutions, I decided to have a monthly focus that helps me bring new habits into my life. The April focus is gratitude. Gratitude seems a bit meaningless. Everyone knows they should be grateful for what they've got, because there are people out there that have a lot less... blah blah blah. If we are grateful only when comparing ourselves to others then I think we're missing the point, because every person is on a different journey. I'll explain why I'm finding gratitude to be a truly transformative force in my life. When you are grateful for something and you make time each day to have this realization, then you simply can't abuse, mistreat or even take for granted what you are grateful for. For example, if I'm grateful for my body, then it follows that I treat it well. Gratitude almost immediately alters your mindset, you see. All of a sudden not eating processed sugar isn't a struggle, but something that I want to do. So with that in mind, here are some sugar-free, gracious chocolate truffles I made.

You simply blitz all the ingredients in a blender, then roll the resulting mush into balls. Roll them around in more cacao powder to finish and press the nut of your choice into the top. These ingredients worked very well but you can of course mix them up with whatever you have available. I have many things to be grateful for right now, but even before all this incredible luck came my way, I had plenty - we all do. I am even making a point right now of being grateful for things that haven't happened yet but I would like to happen, in advance, to encourage them into existence.

Ingredients (6 big truffles)

75g good quality, pitted dates

50g brazil nuts

2 tablespoons desiccated coconut

2 tablespoons coconut oil

3 tablespoons organic cacao powder and a bit more for rolling

Almonds and walnuts to go on top

Spiced white chocolate mousse with crushed pistachios

Finally, something Christmassy

This is the kind of rich indulgence that should only be allowed at this time of year, because such a heavenly taste can only be created with equally sinful ingredients - butter, cream, sugar... Don't worry about it. It's easy to make and will make you shine like a star. If any food has the power of seduction, then this is it. If the people you serve it to like white chocolate that is. Many find it too sweet, yet here I would argue the sweetness is balanced out by the saltiness and spices. 

Melt the white chocolate, with the butter, in a bowl sitting over a pan of simmering hot water. Stir in most of the crushed pistachios (saving a bit for decoration) and spices. Whip the cream with the icing sugar until it reaches the consistency of the squirty cream you can buy in a tin (if needs be, you can replace it with that too). Whip the egg whites with a large pinch of salt, until peaky. Blend the yolks with the cane sugar, until it has completely disintegrated, then add a the vanilla essence. Take the white chocolate off the heat and allow to cool for 4-5min. Stir the egg yolks in. Gently, fold in the egg whites and keep stirring. Finally, add the whipped cream and divide into individual cups, topping with more crushed pistachios. Chill overnight if possible and hallelujah! 

Ingredients (serves 4)

200g white chocolate

1 tablespoon salted butter

200ml whipping cream

1 tablespoon icing sugar

2 good quality eggs (separated)

Large pinch of fine sea salt

1 tablespoon soft brown cane sugar

1 teaspoon good quality vanilla essence

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon nutmeg

Handful crushed pistachios (you can crush them easily once peeled, with the side of a knife)

The best chocolate mousse in the world

I have eaten many, many chocolate mousses in the 34 years I have spent on this planet. Anja's chocolate mousse has been my favourite, closely followed by the one served at Saint Janou in Paris. I have attempted to make many chocolate mousses too. Some attempts have been disastrous (one New Year's Eve a couple of years ago comes to mind), some fair, the last one pretty good, following Elizabeth David's famous recipe I found here. But my wanton days of folly and experimentation are over as far as chocolate mousse is concerned. I know a good thing when I taste it, and I'm happy to eat only this chocolate mousse for the rest of my days. I'd marry it tomorrow if I could

So this is the magic recipe: melt the chocolate over some warm water simmering in a pan, add the butter and mix the two. Beat the egg whites with a pinch of salt until they form peaks and don't move at all. Beat the whipped cream with the icing sugar until they reach the consistency of the stuff you get in a tin, again, almost solid. Stir the egg yolks and sugar together vigorously, until the sugar disintegrates and the mixture turns very pale in colour. Allow the chocolate to cool slightly and mix the egg yolk into it. Fold it into the egg whites, stirring gently. Once it's mixed, fold in the whipped cream. Do not beat at this point. Only stir. Be gentle, yet thorough, like Anja. When everything has turned into a pale brown, creamy goo, cover with cling film and cool in the fridge. Cooling overnight is preferable, but a couple of hours will do if pressed for time, as I was when I made it. Like everything good in life - enjoy, treasure and don't mess around with it!

Ingredients

200g Cadbury's "Bournville" dark chocolate or another dark chocolate that isn't "too dark"
1 tablespoon butter (salted)
3 eggs
2 tablespoons caster sugar
Pinch of salt
250ml whipped cream
1 tablespoon icing sugar

Venison stew with chocolate and chilli

Early Spring, with it's constantly changing moods, can bring about a melancholy in me. I have to remind myself that life isn't just about bright sunshine and balmy Summer evenings; that we need the rain, wind and grey moments too. I am impatient for the sun. I am in fact impatient for everything, bordering on intolerant at times. When something is clear to me, I want to impose that clarity on the whole world. This is an immaturity in me, reality can be seen and expressed in many different ways and everyone has their own process. I am learning to let go. Feeling my impatience, anger and sadness as strongly as I can and then accepting that it makes no difference, and that's how it's supposed to be, so I can relax. I made a late Mother's Day lunch for my mum and the family yesterday. They came an hour and a half early, catching me by surprise and I very nearly ruined it, but luckily managed to relax and accept the situation in the end. The main course was this stew

I had a hunch that venison and dark chocolate would work, especially with a chilli kick. And the red wine. These strong flavours together are a dream. Fry the carrot, onion, celery and ginger first for about 5min in the olive oil. Add the venison chunks and the chilli, seal the meat for a couple of minutes then add the paprika, ground ginger and cumin, stir and fry for another minute, add a splash of water. Season with salt and pepper. Pour over the wine, cover and simmer for about half an hour. Add the red pepper and chocolate. Simmer some more. If it looks dry then add more red wine. It needs about 2 hours in total, until the meat is so soft that it's falling apart, but make sure you stir it every 20min or so and make sure it's not drying out, adding splashes of wine when you need to. Right at the end add the fresh coriander and serve - it works well with sweet potato mash you see up there. For dessert we had Anja's chocolate mousse, which is the best chocolate mousse in the world, and I will tell you about next time

Ingredients (serves 4)

400g venison, in bite-sized chunks (remove any stringy bits)
6-8 squares dark chocolate
1 onion, finely chopped
2 carrots, grated
4 celery stalks, finely chopped
1 red chilli, chopped
1 inch fresh ginger, peeled and chopped
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon paprika
Approximately 1/3 bottle red wine
Handful chopped fresh coriander
Mild oil for frying
Salt and pepper

Chocolate Chlli Con Carne

I've had some kind of awful throat infection the past week, so I haven't been able to get much food down me, yet I've been craving Chilli Con Carne - melt-in-the-mouth beef and vegetables filling me with warm, spicy goodness. The Chilli that I make is always vegetable-rich and always cooked for as long as possible - usually between 2 and 3 hours. P loved it, and I asked him about Chilli Con Carne in Mexico, where he has spent a lot of time. He told me that they often add chocolate, an idea that I fell in love with immediately. So the next day I added some Green&Blacks dark chocolate to the Chilli that I'd made and it really has elevated it to a whole new level for me

I love chilli, and each time I cook it I feel like it tastes just that little bit better than the last time. This is because I have picked up many little "chilli secrets" along the way, and found some things out through the repetitive cooking of this dish over the years. Adding plenty of vegetables is one of these little secrets - they really do add so much flavour - yet they must be chopped as finely as possible for maximum effect. For some reason, this makes a big difference. So once chopped, fry the onion with the grated carrot and celery in plenty of olive oil for about 5 minutes, add the beef and chopped chillies and fry while stirring and breaking up the mince for another 5 min. Add the paprika and ginger, add the wine, keep stirring. Add the chopped tomatoes, crushed garlic, plop the whole chilli in the pan, some salt and pepper and bring to the boil, then turn the heat down and simmer for about 2 hours, stirring occasionally. Add more wine if at any point it seems a bit dry in there - we want enough extra liquid for there to be bubbles. After two hours, taste it and season to your taste, add more paprika if required. Add the chocolate, kidney beans and most of the chopped coriander, reserve some for garnish. Allow the chilli to simmer for another 20min or so like this, then serve on top of rice, with fresh coriander on top and, if you fancy, some sour cream on the side. It's easy to make a good chilli, but to make a really excellent one, you really must put a bit of love and care into it, don't just cook it automatically, but strive to improve and perfect it. Perhaps sometime in the future I will learn a few more secrets and make a better chilli than this, but at the moment, this is the pinnacle 

Ingredients

500g organic minced beef

3 red chillies, 2 chopped finely, 1 whole

2 garlic cloves, chopped and pressed with the back of a knife

2 carrots, grated

1 onion, chopped finely

2 celery sticks, chopped

1 tin of chopped tomatoes

2 glasses of red wine

1 tin of red kidney beans (the ones in chilli sauce work especially well)

Olive oil

Salt and pepper

1 tablespoon paprika

1 teaspoon ground ginger

50g good quality dark chocolate

Large handful fresh, chopped coriander

Slightly avant-garde pancakes - chocolate and banana, dairy-free

You may be wondering what exactly is so avant-garde about chocolate and banana pancakes. Well, it depends on how you use the banana. I didn't mean to make that sound perverted in any way, so I hope that's not how you're reading it. Today, I messed with the very make-up of the pancake, and this, I would argue, is the avant-garde bit. If you want to imagine me wearing the banana skin as a hat while cooking, then that's OK too

When we think of pancakes flour, eggs and milk are the first things that come to mind. But what would happen if you replaced the eggs with something else that's sticky? Like a banana... Well, nothing bad actually. The pancake is a little heavier, a different consistency, but coupled with this pure coco grated on top, it's a glorious combination

The coco is 100% pure, therefore I sweetened the pancake mixture with a bit of honey. I essentially made a soya milk banana milkshake, then whisked it into the flour. I fried the batter with olive oil rather than butter, simply because I ran out of butter, but I guess this makes these pancakes super-healthy as well as delicious

Ingredients

Cup of plain flour - 200g aprox

Cup of soya milk

1 banana

1 Tblsp honey
Pinch of salt

Pure coco for grating

Light olive oil for frying (or butter)

A lovely little Italian cafe/deli in Hackney and the best chocolate mousse in Paris

I have to admit that, what my friend, Magda, innocently pointed out, is true - I have been more than a little hedonistic of late.  However, it's not because I have decided to go off the rails, or because I have finally cracked. I believe that it's simply a reaction to the fact that I don't have a kitchen at the moment,  and therefore I don't have the option to stay home and cook for myself, or have friends round. I feel like I am camping in my own flat at the moment, which may have seemed fun for a night or two, but now is getting very tiring. So I have been choosing to go out most nights.  And then, usually on Saturday afternoons, I come here to stock up for the week: Parioli's

It's is a great, little Italian cafe/deli that I have found in my area (Lower Clapton Road). It's amazingly atmospheric with great coffee; creamy, Sicilian pastries; wines; cheeses; cured meats and other delicious treats. I only ever usually drink coffee when I am on holiday somewhere like France or Italy, where it's part of the culture, however, I do order it here, simply because "when in Rome...". You could of course point out that I am, in fact, on "murder mile" in Hackney, and not Rome, but this cafe makes me feel as if I am in Italy, and that is the point I'm making

This is the loot from last time...

If you like strong cheeses, then I have to recommend the "provolon" - it tastes much stronger than it looks! The cafe is run by a couple, the husband being from Napoli, and the wife from Sicily, therefore the food you find in here is a mixture of the two regions. It's only open during the day, and you have to come in the morning if you are to get hold of some fresh bread

As part of my hedonism, I decided to go to Paris for the day on Tuesday (well, if you're going to be hedonistic, you may as well do it properly!). My friend, Cat, who lives in New York and I haven't seen for about two years, was there for fashion week, and emailed me just before she got on the plane, on the off chance that I might feel like popping over. And since I had enough Airmiles - I did just that. That up there, is where we had dinner last night, and I have to recommend it. It's called "Chez Janou" and it's on Rue Roger...

Apart from the best chocolate mousse I have ever tasted in my life, we also ate rabbit with mashed potato and juniper berries; aromatic grilled seabass; and simple goat's cheese and spinach salad. We had a wonderful evening catching up on the last couple of years, and putting the world to rights. Cat is beautiful and happy, and Paris is as charming as ever, so I left feeling uplifted and energized. I also have to strongly recommend being completely impulsive now and again. It's reminded me that I'm alive and that the world is an amazing place, full of opportunities to be grabbed, delicious dinners to be eaten, and lovely, interesting people to share it with

"Pets du nonne" without pastry

How can you not want to make cakes with a name like "nun's farts"? Well, actually I imagine some people might not find the name that appealing, but for me, along with the simplest recipe in the world, it was a "fait accompli", or something like that. Now, "pets du nonne" often come in pastry, but this recipe I found in the Green'n'Blacks cookbook, is a much lighter version. I adapted it slightly - firstly I didn't use angelica, as I couldn't find any anywhere. Then, I substituted walnut bits for almond flakes, which worked fabulously well, even if I do say so myself

Ingredients

50g dark chocolate (chilled)

2 egg whites

pinch of salt

75g caster sugar

75g flaked almonds

(1 teaspoon dark rum optional)

You simply beat the egg whites and salt until they form stiff peaks, as when making meringue. Then start whisking in the sugar a bit at a time. Finally, fold in the almonds, chocolate which has been broken up into little bits, and the rum if you are using it (I used Morgan's Spiced). Line a baking tray with foil or baking paper and grease slightly - this is something I didn't do and I ended up with a few broken cakes, they are so incredibly delicate that you don't want to be prising them off at the end. Put little blobs of the mixture onto the tray, making sure that they don't touch. Then bake in a pre-heated oven at 180 degrees for about 8 minutes. Turn the oven off and leave them in there for at least an hour, I left them for two

That's a broken nun's fart up there. This photo shows much more about these cakes then the ones that look whole and pretty, as they are no different to meringues on the outside. Yet on the inside the melted chocolate, delicate almonds and creamy meringue have a right old party. I am no baking queen but these will definitely become part of my repertoire - I love simple recipes and that taste amazing, and these fit the bill perfectly

Chilli and beetroot red velvet cakes

I am discovering that there are certain advantages to being single: you are no longer ruled by your mobile phone; you don't have to rush, or even look at the time; you can watch anything you want on TV; and you have the freedom to eat red velvet cakes for dinner, if you so please. Tonight, I so pleased. As you have probably realized due to the lack of cakes on this blog, I do not bake often. I dislike measuring ingredients and being precise. With cakes, you need to measure, as I have learnt through many bad experiences

I first ate red velvet cakes a few months ago, when my friend from work brought them in. As she is now on a diet, I can't rely on her to make them anymore, and this is why I have had to venture into cake making territory myself. I have adapted two recipes for this - the cake itself is from the Green'n'Blacks chocolate cookbook, whereas the icing is from the Hummingbird bakery. I wanted to use the beetroot to colour the cakes in order to make them healthier, but they turned out less red and more brown. My own tweek to this recipe is using chilli chocolate, as well as adding a pinch of chilli powder, which gives it a bit of a kick. You start off by preheating the oven to gas mark 180/ gas mark 4. Sift together the drinking chocolate and flour, mixing in the sugar. Melt the chocolate and butter together and puree the beets. Whisk the eggs, then add the beets. Add the chocolate and beet mixture into the dry ingredients and keep whisking/blending. Now, all the recipes say to bake this for 50 minutes, but mine were ready after 40min. For the icing, mix the butter in with the icing thoroughly, then add the cream cheese and blend. I used the whisk for this. Once the cakes had cooled, I used a spatula to cover them in icing, putting the the mini marshmallows on top, as decoration. You will need to use either quite strong cups or double up, so they don't get too out of shape. I doubled up, but as you can see they still got slightly deformed. Next time, I will definitely use hardcore, strong cups, so that they look even prettier. I may even get a special tray...

Ingredients

100g drinking chocolate

230g self raising flour

200g caster sugar

100g dark chocolate (with chilli is possible)

125g slightly salted butter

250g cooked beetroot

3 large eggs

Pinch of chilli powder

Icing:

300g icing sugar

50g butter

150g cream cheese

Mini marshmallows

By the way, this recipe makes about a million cakes. Well, that's a slight exaggeration, but more than 24 anyhow, so you may want to halve it if you do not want that many...